New children on the loose and Jack brings up a valid point (and don't forget about Brad Hennessey tomorrow)

So, we have a new child in the house named Caleb. He's a chunky little boy, born at 9 lbs 8 ozs. Most kids lost weight right after they're born. Caleb managed to drop a pound...and then put that pound back on in a day! Seriously, the kid's an eating machine! He's finally starting to open up his eyes and look around more. I think he really liked the womb. Everyone else manage to put pictures on their blog. I'll see what I can do, but you can darn well guess that I'm not quite sure how to do this. I think it's working. The picture is of me and Caleb as I read the new TANF regulations from HHS. Anyway, this kids grunts like nobody's business including all during the night which prompts me to sit up in bed at 1 in the morning, half asleep and zombie like. This usually wakes up my wife who tells me to chill and she gets the baby. Brilliant. Really brilliant.
Brad Hennessey pitches tomorrow in a double header. Let's see how he does. I think I'm the unofficial Brad Hennessey fan club. However, I think the Bay Area writers appreciate him. A recent article mentioned that he could probably start for twenty other teams...so why are the Gigantes flirting with .500? I dunno. Maybe it's because the ancient ones are always injured. I think Barry and Moises have played something liked 30 games together. Sigh. At least the pitching is vastly improved.
So, my friend "Jack" brought up some valid points in his latest blog entry at http://blackshoebrown.blogspot.com/. This is something I've alwasy planned on penning, mainly because it's such an important point. There are certain rules of decorum in a men's bathroom according to me, and it seems that "Jack" would agree with me based on his experiences. I follow these rules when I use the bathroom, and I expect others patrons of bathrooms to follow the same. First, when there are an odd number of urinals, you are expected to take an odd number i.e. urinal 1, 3, 5, 7 etc. If there is no one in the bathroom, you take the farthest urinal from the bathroom door. This is especially true if there is a wall that separates the urinals from the rest of the bathroom. Standing at number one limits the initial sightline and the next patron might accidentally choose number 2 or 3 and be awkwardly close. Next, if the farthest urinal is taken, then use the closest urinal to the door (and thus farthest from the other patron). The next man who enters will spot the farthest user and will thus be wary when approaching #1 and will make sure not to use number two. If 1 and 5 are taken, then take number three. In a large bathroom (especially in a business or university), there should always be a one urinal buffer. The fourth patron should use a stall. Stalls should be divied out the same way as the urinals i.e. take the odd number stall, furthest away first. Only if 1,3,5 stalls are full may a man proceed to use urinals 2 and 4. If these are full, you may use stalls 2 and 4. Stalls always present a problem because usually one is handicapped. If one if handicapped, it is okay to skip it for moral reasons (as in, what if a handicapped person needs this?) and proceed to another approved stall number. These rules do not apply to stadium, truck stop and campground bathrooms.
Also, I have a personal rule not to talk to anyone I know in a bathroom. There is nothing more awkward (as "Jack" points out) then to have someone strike up a conversation in the bathroom. When someone tries, I kindly say, "I'm sorry, I don't talk in bathrooms" and then ignore them. In some cases, you must be firm. The urinal conversation is easy to kill. It's the washing hands conversations that are more difficult. The best way to avoid those is to look really uncomfortable and say you might have to use a stall. I remember having a boss try to explain to me a library policy in the bathroom (that would be David Day) and although I disagreed with what he was saying, I kept nodding and saying "Sure sure" because I couldn't stand talking in the bathroom, even though he was coming and I was leaving. It's so weird to talk in there. Not a place of conversation.
There are my rules for public bathrooms. I should nail them to a bathroom wall somewhere.