Humphrey v. Wolf

When I went home last month, I found some of my old books. One of those was "The Sea Wolf" by Jack London, a gritty yarn featuring lots of beatings. (I think I was a very angry young man as the two scenes of literature that gripped my mind were 1) The Cooky v. Shark scene in the Sea Wolf in which Cooky gets half-drowned, gets attacked by a shark, loses part of his leg, and bites Wolf Larsen on the calf and 2) The Hindley-Heathcliff moment where Heathcliff surprises Hindley and beats him against the flagstones. Others thrilled to the ennui of Holden Caulfield or long boring derivative quests to find Swords of Shannara; not I, no, not I.)



I brought the Sea Wolf and Frankenstein (there's another demented book) home with me. I had forgotten the conversations between the unfortunately named Humphrey Van Weyden and the fortunately named Wolf Larsen. Cap'n Larsen says this in a rant about life: "You have made no food. Yet the food you have eaten or wasted might have saved the lives of a score of wretches who made the food but did not eat it." He also compares humanity to yeast to the point of overkill. I get it...man=yeast. Whatever. Anywho, I managed to get halfway through the book before I stopped reading for what seemed to be no apparent reason but then it hit me. I only like half the book! The moment they find the woman adrift off the coast of Japan, I lose interest because then it devolves into a sappy love story between Humphrey and Ann-Margaret (I can't remember her name, so Ann-Margaret's acting as the placeholder; I'm sure she won't mind). Despite having aged 10 years since the last time I read the book, I still only care about the violent parts. I guess I haven't grown up at all. Well, anything to feel younger.