Phase II

Precipitating event: Caleb threw a golf ball into Yarden Right that consists of ivy and shrubbery. I was working fairly mosquito-free pulling out vine like weeds among the Rhubarb Stalks (mosquito-free meaning I only had to contend with a couple of hovering devil bugs at any given moment). As we commenced our search for the golf ball (when turned out to be in vain as our ivy must be of the Wrigley Field variety), we were met with fierce resistance in the form of at least 25 or so mosquitos. Beaten back, humiliated, angry (think Gimli's reaction post-Moria), I swore to do something. And something I did.

Reaction to precipitating event: Purchase of mosquito death spray. Death spray sprayed in all parts of the yarden. Yes, we contemplated buying the mosquito candles that supposedly frighten the mosquitos away. But, the yard is like crime in mid-1990s New York. We needed to do something drastic. And even if our neighbors later level the allegation that "Hey, you just moved the mosquito problem into our backyards" as Jersey said after Guiliani scared all the criminals across the river, I won't care. Not one little bit.

Further updates will be posted as events warrant. We're about to embark on Project Purposefully Grow Things in which we plant various vegetables late in the season around the Rhubarb Stalks and watch them get eaten by rabbits and deer while visions of Thanksgiving cucumbers and red onions dance in our heads. Such dreams are facilitated by the purchase of miracle grow which I naively think will magically speed up the harvest, kill weeds, and convince wildlife to eat the ivy instead. (If you remember your Star Wars, I believe a young Luke Skywalker asked C3P0 to do the same thing, which C3P0, tragically, was unable to do. But that's because there was no miracle grow for Uncle Owen's sand farm. (Although that blue drink that Aunt Beru was forcing on them looked a little like miracle grow...))